notes from my partner-in-crime upon handing over the bedtime routine to me so that he can go out and attend a punk rock show:

1. Getting close to 7?
2. Start telling yourself that this will be like herding cats. Then…
3. Start telling A. that you will be running the bath water.
4. Tell A. directly when you start running the bath water.
5. Once the bath water is running, mention to A. that he start looking for toys to put in the bath. (Note: I sometimes down play this b/c I don’t want to deal with lots of toys or toys that are hard to deal with wet. But fun is always good! ;)  )
6. While the bath water is running and directly after it is done I close all blinds. I used to close them all but I mostly leave the front window living room blinds up. I always think the darker the better but who knows.
   This is also the time to close the living room/bedroom door. This will keep him from running around as much.
7. Once the blinds are closed if I’m not too focused on “getting it done” I will start tidying/cleaning his room then our room then the kitchen, just adding sweet patient reminders to him that he needs to find toys for the bath.
8. If I am/need to be focused on getting him in the bath then I patiently talk to him about finding toys for the bath and do that repeatedly.
9. I will also close the bathroom door to our bedroom if I’m really focused…this essentially traps him physically into looking for toy(s).
10. Once he picks 2-3 toys and is next to the bathtub (and I’m ready for him to get in) I tell me “Ok, let’s take off your clothes,” and I start pulling his shirt off.
11. If he says “no, one more…” whatever, I usually just let him finish his plan (remember…herding cats) and he’s usually pretty receptive b/c he’s used to the routine. If he’s not receptive then I have to be more stern about him getting off his clothes and getting in the bath.
12. I’ll usually allow about 15-20 minutes for all of above (I think). But have definitely shortened that when there are constraints.
13. Once he’s in the bath…
    
    • Usually I’m fairly busy cleaning up his room and our room. Once he’s been in about 15 minutes I’ll settle into the bathroom and playing with him.
    • Race Trains: really simple. Just move the delivery truck (he’ll show you which one or maybe you’ll have a different one) around the bathtub “racing”.
    • Otherwise you could put something in the bathtub and create a fun game yourselves.
14. He’s usually in about 30-40 mins total.
    
    • Around 20 minutes into it I say “It’s time for bum-bum-tum-tum”. I’m pretty consistent about doing when I say I’m going to and I offer him a choice of how to do it…laying tummy down (most usually) or sitting down (a pain for both of us but he’s a cat and I’m herding him, or standing up (never happens any more)).
    • You can pretty much start taking things out of the bath to dry after bum-bum-tum-tum, if everything is ready for bedtime. He likes everthing out of the bath before he gets out. He usually keeps something when he gets out but that usually just goes on the toilet and stays there.
    • You should put on his new Yoda/Ewok robe.
15. Usually I will carry him to the sofa regardless if you are there. We will rest and dry shortly there and I will establish his eating needs then. (Just so you know…he’s not always hungry when he says he’s hungry…sometimes he is a herd of cats! But for the most part he will eat something at this point, especially if he hasn’t yet or if there is plenty of time.)
16. Once he’s eating he usually chooses between putting on clothes or brushing teeth. I just make it clear that we brush teeth after putting on clothes if he does that first.
17. Brushing Teef: I put the toothpaste (open it slightly to help him) and the toothbrush on the sink and encourage as best I can that he brushes his own teeth first. He can squeeze the tube now so he pretty much does the whole thing by himself. Just be aware that he mostly plays around when he’s brushing his teeth so I still do at after.
    If you want the details of brushing his teeth you will need to ask me about it. Just make sure he does “EEEE” and “AHHHH” and brush all of them.
18. Then put on clothes and tell him to pick one (or two) books.
19. He really thinks it’s a treat to read two books (I feel so lame) so if you can manage it have him pick two.
20. Read the books.
21. Then after the last book is read say you’re turning off the lights. Up until the last week I’ve been turning off lights but now he’s back to doing it himself.
22. Lay down with him for 10-15 minutes and talk about YOUR day.
23. Then say you are getting up and that you will leave the door open. he likes to sleep sideways at the foot of his bed so I put a pillow on the end, right side of his bed and kiss him good night once he’s laying down w/ blanket on.
24. He will probably call you back in for:
    • Water. Have a cup in room already. This can happen 2 or more times.
    • Blanket on. Make sure you ask if he wants it and do it before leaving room. He may kick it off and ask for it again.
    • Door to bathroom closed. Even if it is I pull it to again.
    • Food. Your call. But if he hasn’t eaten this is a pain to get up and start all over again w/ brushing teeth, etc.
    • Hold your hand, sleep next to me, etc., etc. I probably go back in less than 20% in the past couple of weeks. Your call. Listening to podcast, story, music, is helpful at this point b/c who knows what to expect, really.
    • Otherwise I try to make sure there’s not too much light going into his room and try to stay still and quiet for at least 15-20 minutes.
    • Oh, it’s still light outside when we turn off lights now. He may mention that but I just say it will be dark soon.

Phew. Done. Ask questions if you want.